Wednesday, November 24, 2010

How do you describe someone in a fight? in a story? PLEAASE help me!!?

Im having trouble with my characters. The two guys are in a fight but i don't know how to explain it..



i have this so far;



“Who is he?” Dylan asked going up to him, rubbing his cheek.

“Hi, its really nice to meet you my name is-” But before Justin could finish his sentence Dylan punched him straight in the jaw.

I heard a thump as Justin landing on the hard ground.

“Dylan!” I screamed. “What is your problem!”

I ran over to Justin, who was sitting on the ground rubbing his jaw. I bent down on the dirty ground. I pushed his hair back so I could see his blue eyes. “Are you okay”

He looked at me. “Im fine”

Dylan cracked his knuckles. “Is he your new boyfriend?” Dylan asked. “Did you replace me with him!”.

I got up off the ground. “What are you talking about!” I yelled. “Justin is my friend, his so sweet to me, unlike somebody I know!”

Justin got up of the ground too. “Come here” He said to Dylan rubbing his jaw.

Dylan grinned and walked towards him, but before he got half way justin ran towards him, like lighting blot, and smacked him against the tree.

“No!”I screamed. “Justin he will kill you, his more power full”. But Justin didnt listen he kept on fighting. Justin began to chock him.



Dylans face turned purple, He grabed Justin by the arm and swung him back onto the ground. Dylan ran over there just as Justin was getting up, he smacked him in the mouth again,

Justin fell onto the ground, groaning.



Thats abit cheesy and its not that good! so please dont say my spelling is bad or wahtever i dont know how to explain the fight!



you can change it around and stuff to make it really good! please need help on this!



thank you! (:How do you describe someone in a fight? in a story? PLEAASE help me!!?Hm, I think you should add some more gritty stuff, and THEN the dialogue. Describe the characters' (all of them, but especially the main's) emotions, the sickening crunch of a fist pummelling very hard.

A fight is charged up with emotion - use words in such a way that conveys the tension and anger in the air!How do you describe someone in a fight? in a story? PLEAASE help me!!?If you need inspiration watch the film 'Fight Club' (1997ish) and try bringing in a bit of gritty description of fights.



Actually it is a fantastic film, very very clever and also very graphic fighting scenes. Try it!How do you describe someone in a fight? in a story? PLEAASE help me!!?Dylan glared at Justin who was standing just in front of him , terrified as he was he approached him, staring at Dylan's muscular body, and turned his blue-eyes all the way down his knees. His muscles poked out of the vest he was wearing as it stretched tightly on his body, accentuating the belly muscles across it.

%26quot;H-Hi, it's really nice to meet, I'm...%26quot; Justin stattured, afriad to say something inappropriate. Dylan interrupted him mid-sentence and stretched out his arm to punch him in his jew, his arm moved so fast, it blurred that if I had blinked, I would have missed his movement.

Justin's jew protruded out through his skin, I could hear his teeth rubbing against each other. A few drops of blood splashed out of his mouth as the head was thrusted backward ...